Image provided by: Siuslaw Pioneer Museum; Florence, OR
About The West. (Florence, Lane County, Or.) 1890-1921 | View Entire Issue (June 7, 1901)
T the west |h <j| support IT J G-JX u K T D H S T E I ^ Why let a ll y o u r n e ig h - regular daily tkips H> Barrett, Prop’r, b o rs a n d -----B etw een ■ Stage L eaves Steam boat Landing on frie n d s the U m pqua for Florence Saturdays. think you R eturning, Stage Leaves rlu ren ce m u s t be Sundays. tw e n ty E xtra Trips W hen N ecessary S T E A M E R L I L L IA N y e a r s Charges R easonable. -M A K E S D A IL Y T B I P 8 - • b oîcer than you are ? Yet it’s impossible to From Mapleton to Florence look young with the E U G E N E -FL O R E N C E -------- A N D R E T U R N .--------- color of 70 years in the hair. It’s sad to STA G E l in e . Leaves Mapleton at 7 A. M. see young p e r s o n s Leaves Florence at 2 P M. E. B a n g s , P roprietor. On SUNDAY’S leaves M apleton at 8 A. M. look prematurely old Stflge leaves! E u g e n e fo r F lo r and Florence at 3 P. M. in this way. Sad be ence d a ily e x ce p t S u n d a y a t 6 a. m . A r r iv e s a t F lo re n c e th e d a y fo l cause it’s all unneces lo w in g a t 10 a . m . sa ry ; for g r a y h a i r THE STEAM ER R e tu r n in g stage leaves F lo re n c e may always be re ► fo r F u g e n e d a ily e x ce p t S u n d a y a t 1 A C M E s to r e d a t 2 p. m . A n ives i n E u g e n e a t 0 STEAM ER M A R G U E R IT E , O -----w i l l m ake -------- S T A O E L IN E . "Florera ani Heai of Tile. O F F IC E R S ...........H . R . K incaid. ( ................. J. R . H ill ■ la tie ra V . . H . P . Edw ards ...............E . U . Lee .. W . W . W ithera ■ g ............................ A . S. Patterson _____ . . . 1). P . Burton tool S u p e r in te n d e n t---- W . M. M iller r v e y o r .l............................... C* M- C ollier p. m . th e d a y fo llo w in g . .G . W , f . r i i t i n .. ,C . H . H olden W i l l c a rry fre ig h t a n il passengers ■ f . ........................G. C. Cum pton from F lo re n c e to San F ran cisco . S in g le fa re — — - - 5.00. R o u n d trip - - - - 9.0 0. W i l l also b rin g u p fre ig h t T ic k e ts fo r sale a t E . B ang s’ C IT Y O F F IC E R S . **# w #** liv e r y b a rn , E u g e n e , and a t O. W . F o r fu rth e r in fo rm irtio n in q u ire H u r d ’s office in F lo re n c e . Marion Morris - OF — A l l th ro u g h fre ig h t on the stage f E . A. Evana, W ertherson, e ith e r w a y b etw een E u g e n e au d A. W . B E A D LE & CO. Brynd, M a p le to n , w ill be charged a t th e risten sen. 22 M a r k e t St. ra te o f tw o cents p er pou n d d u r in g ...........J . G. P help s San F ra n c is c o , C a lifo rn ia . th e m o n th s o f O cto ber, N o v e m b e r, ...........O. W . Hurd D ecem b er, J a n u a ry , F e b ru a ry , M a rc h a n d A p r il, an d one cent per . . .G . C. Cum pton pou n d d u rin g th e m o n th s o f M a y , J u n e , J u ly , A u g u s t a n d Septem ber. T J .M M S s h eriff <¡) is now fo r i conomlc&l. ts to the at fo r five ceni m e liquor a N Pacific, Florence Lodge N o. 107. R egdlar com m unication on second (MtOt Saturdays in each m onth . E . W . C o b b , W . M. B, M ills , S e c r e t a r y . __________ R For over half a cen tury this has been the standard hair prepara tion. It is an elegant dressing; stops tail ing of the h air; makes the hair grow ; and cleanses th o s c a l p from dandruff. N O T A R IE S . S i.00 a bottle. All druggists. A. R. BUTTOLPH, ** I have been using Ayer's Hair Vigor for over 20 years and I can heattily recommend it to the public as the best hair tonic iu ex is tone©.” Mrs. G. L. A ldeuson , A p ril 94, i n n ► J * '»•very 1st and 3d Tuesdays M em bers and v isitin g " " T r . ; bretbrsn-in good sta n d in g are cord ially !4 invited to a tten d . A. O. F unke , M . \ \ I. G. K hotts , R ecorder. A N it- u M p t h - F lo r S P u llm a n MOUk C a rs E le g a n t D in in g C a rs S le e p in g FLORENCE. - - - Shaving and H aircu ttin g neatly done. Razor Honing and Scissors G rind 5,000 H E L E N A »»d BUTTE G eneral B anking B usiness T H R O U G H T IC K E T S Transacted on "Favorable Terms TO '.— Su nset Rebekah Lodge N o. eets in Odd F ellow s’ hall, e second and fourth T hars- O H IC A C O ;s in each m onth. W A S H IN G T O N K atherine B kund , N . G. B eil , Sec. P H IL A D E L P H IA D ra ft. iw ued on the prin cip a l d tie a of the U nited State, and foreign countrte.. Interest allowed on Demand Certificates of Deposit when le ft stated period. C ity and C ounty W arrants bought. W . E. B R O W N , President. tic k e t, P . W . OSBURN. C ashier. Block, ing a specialty. * * F ro n t S tre et, * Florence, Oregon. BEST FOR THE BOWELS C ollections receive our prompt attcn tlou. etc., c a ll on or w rite D . A . P A IN E , Vice President. ___________ _ _ _ . thg’-----4 — t -SL r o st, e a s ie s t, m o st jie r fe e t w a y e l k e e p in g th e bow els c le a r and c le a n is to ta k e W . W . BROW N, Aaa’t Cashier. CANDY C A T H A R T IC WANTED—ACTIVE MAN f>F GOOD C H A R .V ter Io d eliver nnd collect in Oregon, for old established maiiufscturimr w holesale house. <900 a year, sure pay. Honesty more than ex p eri ence required. Onr reference, any bunk in any city. Enclose self addressed stamped envelope. »eurlxirn M anufacturers, Third Floor, 331 Dei Chicago. A ssistant General Passenger Agent, '‘ a t t o r n e y s P po pr ie t o r . * and prom ptly W IN N IP E G — Ocenn W ave Camp No. R. M c M u r p h e y , eets each alternate Saturday G a le s’ H all, Acm e. V isitin g General Agent. Rooms 2 and 4, Shelton invited to attend. E U G E N E , OR EG O N. G eo . G. P eil , V . C. A. D C H A R L T O N , B erlin , C lerk. * M M A R I O N * M O R R IS , CRO O KSTO N ,F .— Mignon Lodge N o. 105, N E W Y O R K k ah Degree, m eets in M eyer & , M apleton, the 1st and 3rd B O R T O N A N D A L L 'enings iti each m onth. P O IN T S E A S T »»'> S O U T H M attie 0 . H udson , N . G. Fnr In fo rm a tio n , tim e c .rd n , m a p , and B ean , Sec. . UL * Of Eugene, Oregon FARGO GRAND FO RK* TO OREGON Loan -3 Savings Bank D U L U T H _______ K ctor, Tex. T O N S O R IA L - P A R L O R . EUGENE M IN N E A P O L IS _____ you do not obtain all the benefits I f yow you expected expeek from the Vl*or, write the Doctor . “—*■? about It. Address, D a. J. O. AYER. Lowell, Maes. A. A. a . A PUBLIC. C a rs •T . FAUL Irene E ncam pm ent, N o. 42, I. O .’O. E. hall in Florence and fourth Friday of earli M em bers of th is degree are ly invited to attend. 8 . J. S kymoub , O. P . Scribe. q M O R R IS . NOTARY T o u ris t M a|de Lodge N o.. 139, m eets hursday even in g in M eyer & , M apleton, Oregon. B roth stan ding invited to atten d . T. J. N xklv , N . G . ps, Sec. 1 O re g o n no«, M A R IO N S le e p in g •very W We ednesday ev en in g in Lod^e H a .11, ll Flore nice, O regon. Brothers in g in v ited to atten d. E . A. E van », N . G. 8ec. i r v is o r N o tary P d b lic , S u rv ey o r U O. U. W- P erp etu a Lodge, N o. 131, jr c M ORTHERN 3 E C R E T S O C IE T IE S . 255 M orrison St., Cor., 3d. P o r tla n d , O r. NO. 6. and accom panied it w ith kicks on the A F a b le F e r W orneau i door, nnd after seven or eigh t m inutes T here w as once a W om an wbe Fete 1 the druggist app ealed and Indignantly th a t her Husband staid Out too Late HE THOUGHT HE HAD TAKEN POI- dem auded: a t N ight. She therefore D evised » “ W hat In thunder do you m ean by P lan to Cure him of this. H e r Plan SON BY MISTAKE. tryin g to kick m y door In?" w a s to R ise Early In order to Insure “I ’ve—I’ve taken poison!” replied Mr. his R etirin g Early. T h e O ld M a n G ets n B ad S c a re , L o t B ow ser a s he staggered In and sat “ O nly In th is Way w ill he he able W h e n H e F i n d . H im s e lf O a t o f to g e t E nough Sleep,” she said. D e n s e r H e E v e n s U p T h ln a s I n Il i a dow n. “Oh, you hnve! Couldn’t upset j H er H usband, who usnally Endeav Own W ay. things any other w ay, and so you took ored to P le a se her, rose W ithout Com [Copyright, 1901, by C. B. Lewis.) plaint a t S ix O'clock, but Continued poison! W hat w a s It?” T h e even in g had been a p leasan t one “Laudanum ! I—I m ade a m istake. to sta y Out I-ate. Perceiving th at her w ith the B ow sers, but Just as th ey I thought I w as taking cough sirup. P urpose w a s not Accomplished, the w ere ready to go to bed Mr. B ow ser i D on’t d elay or I'm a dead m an!” W om an ch an ged the Hour to Five fe lt a touch o f sore throat and a n “Probably grabbed up a bottle In th e 1 O'clock. _ r nounced: ! dark and guzzled aw ay. T h at’s the I “T h e M orning H ours are the B e st fee "I g o t m y fe e t w e t yesterd ay and j w a y w ith m ost m en. I ’ll give you a W ork,” she said, “and I understand probably took i c M. I think I ’ll tak e a strong em etic, but I’m afraid It’s going th at th e M orning A ir possesses G reat pretty big dose o f th at cough sirup of ! to be a close sh ave.” Virtues." m ine and bead it off. I suppose it's in ] T h e Idea, o f course, w a s to g e t th e H er H usb and O bjected, but Rose a t th e m edicine c h est on the sh elf?” 1 patient to throw the laudanum off his F ive, a s she W ished. “Y es; I sa w It there th e other d ay,” Ltouiach, and for th e n ext h a lf hour Still he continued to Com e In Lata. replied Mrs. B ow ser, “b u t y o u ’ve got Mr. B ow ser w a s dosed after heroic Then the W om an fixed th e Hour ad i m easures. T he dru ggist finally an Four-thirty. “ I have a lw a y s en joyed Seeing the nounced th a t th e m om ent o f peril had passed, but sen t him hom e to drink a Sun R ise.” sh e said. “ In th a t C ase,” said her Husbaod quart o f stron g coffee and advised that he w alk up and dow n for a couple of decidedly, "I Shall N ot go to bed A t hours. Mrs. B ow ser had the coffee All, since It w ould N ot bo W orth my ready, and It w a s alm ost a hum an W hile. I w ill S tay up AU N ight and w reck sh e gnzed at as he entered the take m y Sleep a t M y Office la the house. Sh e hadn’t the heart to re Afternoon. So W e w ill have Break proach him for his carelessn ess, and fa st a t Three O’clock If you like." T h is te a ch es as th at th e E arly Were* w h en he had disposed o f th e coffee she helped him on w ith his overcoat aud w ill Turn.—C entury. sa w him ou t on the street. H e hadn’t A lw a y s W l l l l n e * • O b l i < - . paced th e len gth o f the block before he It w a s a T ex a s tow n , and a long fe ll In w ith an old tramp w h o w as looking for lodgings In som e doorw ay lim bed T exan w as m aking serosa the and w h o w a s soon Inform ed o f w hat public square tow ard the courthouse Jiad happened. H e w a s a rough look w ith a revolver In his band when he in g man, b u t he had a kind heart, and w as stopped by a man who asked: "Are you on your w a y to th e court- ACROSS THE LABEL RAN THE WO«D “ LAVDA- ] he took Mr. B ow ser’s arm and said: j “A ll right, cully. I see how It Is. h o u s e f *UM.” “ Yes. sir; I am,” was the reply. ... such a lot of bottle« there that you Tired w ith the turmoil of life, you “G oing to shoot an yb od y f ’ must be careful. Better bring It up started out to commit suicide, but “Yes, sir; Lawyer Johnson. I f * I thought better of It after swallowing stairs when you have found It.” When she had gone up stairs. M r. a dose. Just my case exactly. I've hadn't been for btm, 1 shouldn't bees Bowser brought the chest down from ! tried It six different times. Easy now, lost my cose yesterday. Yes, slrffigolng the top shelf of the closet and looked ' old rosebud! Lean on me, and we'll to fill him full of lead.” “ Are you In any greet hurry atient It over. I t was not long before he i w alk up and down and damn the eyes Itf lighted on the celebrated “Cure a Cold ' of the world In general together.” “No sp ecial hurry, b u t w hen I hare In Ten Seconds," recommended to him I "G ’way—g’way from mel" M r. Bow ■hooting on hand I lik e to get It Off tag ■lx months before by a traveling doc ser got up the strength to exclaim. tor and put up by his fam ily druggist, | "Never, my conscience stricken mind a s soon a s possible.” “O f course; buL yon sea, Lnwysv and, elevating the bottle, he took a friend. I shall w alk w ith you, and as hearty swig o f the contents. H e car we promenade you can pour your tale Johnson Is now argnlng a case tor me ried np stairs w ith him a pleasant feel o f sorrow Into my ear and be sure of and won’t be through for 40 minutes. He's going to win It for sure If net In ing that his cold had been knocked Into my sympathy.” terrupted, and I f you w ill only held an They had been w alking fo r nn hour the middle of last week, and nothing interrupted that feeling until he Wee and Mrs. Bowser had been dividing her for awhile you w ill do me a greet fn- In bed and sleep stealing over him and tim e between making more coffee In vor.” “W hy, certainly; glad yon mentioned the kitchen and looking out of the Mrs. Bowser said: “I hope you made no mistake about front door when the thought struck It; no hurry about the «bootleg so aa It her to take a look a t the bottles. There comes off today, and you can count on that bottle." me. Have a drink w ith yon? W ith “H o w could I make n mistake?” be was the cough sirup, end there was tbs the greatest of pleasure, and I f John laudanum, but the latter bottle had no asked In a dreamy way. son Is a particular friend o f yoorn I ’N “ Easy enough. You nr? very absent- contents. In fact. It was as dry as a shoot him as softly as I can and givs minded. Don't yen remember e*ce boas. As there had been nothing In It to him every show to die like • * taking a tablespeonfnl e f sewing ma drink, M r. Bowser could have made no man.”—Boston Globe. mistake. She ran out a t once to Inform chine oil In place e f * tonic?” A doubt entered hla mind, and he eat him o f the facL The tram p was still T h e tle e to l up. T w o m ore doubts followed Ute solicitously leading him up and down Tw o young ladies on 8L Paul i nnd encouraging him to lir e on. Mr. went to the theater the other evenings first, and he got out o f bed. Bowser beard the news, took a moment and their father, thinking they had a “W hat la It?” asked Mrs. Bowser. “ I ’ve got to go down and see abont to digest It, and w ith a wild whoop of latchkey, went to bed at bis usual hoar, that Infernal old bottle. 1 know It isn’t exultation be slammed the old man up and the servants all lefL Whan the In possible that I got hold of the wrong against a shads tree, picked np the cat dies returned, they rang the hell re stuff, but you've had to mix In nnd which had followed Mrs. Bowser and peatedly and beat on the door, hot get make me wonder about IL I can al made a run for the house. Site follow Du answer. Finally they began to de most Imagine that I feel a strange ed him, and as the door was closed be spair, when a neighbor who had bean taste la my mouth.” hind her end several other whoops awakened by the din appeared In White H e growled to himself aa ho pulled came to hie ears the kind hearted tour at his window opposite and aakad what on bis trousers and started down stairs. ist leaned over the gate nnd muttered: was the matter. "W hy, I was about to strike the old The cheat was on the stand ns he had “W e are locked out and left IL and ns ba lighted the gas the coon for n quarter, end here he’a gone awake papa,” came the reply la i cat rolled off the lounge sad stared at and got over It and given me the cold “ W alt a minuta,” said the i throw dowel Hang a man who don’t ted men on the other aide of the i him In surprise. “ I t was the right bottle, of course," know when he’s got • good thlngl” “Your father has a telephone in hla M. Q uad . be mused, "and w hat a fool 1 was to room, and I w ill call him up." * 0 the central was called. “ Give me number — aald the neighbor. t As soon as the bell sounded In the room of the sleeping father he awake w ith a start and ran to the 1 “H ello, w h a t la the m atter?” “ Is that you, So-and-so?” “ Yes; w h a t Is wanted?" "Your d au ghters arc at the front l tryin g to g e t In. Open the door. nlghL"—B altim ore Sun. A S k e lr le a . I A. it w ill> do I t» S liv ou Ut I C. W OODCOCK, r A tto rn e y a t L aw , F O re g o n Rug« m rn o o tn - 7 and 8 M ela re n ’« B uild ing. Sp«el*lAiteui' <i> g iv e n to c o l le c t io n au d pro- I m U bttsiues F. EU c hfo HlbliC W I C. H . A T - P O R N E Y — A T - L A W u d U. 8. L and C ommissioner . L IK E C A N D Y JO H N 0 . BEC K , F t. Terrace, O regon. P le a sa n t. P a la ta b le , P o te n t. Tupt .» Good, Do G ood, N ever Klck< n, W euken, o r G ripe, 10, t». and M co o ts per box. W rite fo r fr e e num pfc, nnd b o o k le t on h e a lth . A ddress *"3 W . H . W EATHEBSON, F lorence, Oregon STEBU5H cxsmr roxrixT, nnrAfio or «F irm «. KEEP YOUH BLOOD CLEAN , HOLDEN, , Florence Real Estate Agency. so u g h t, sold And exchanged. Tlm ker tknds » «peetsliy. Prairie Hotel. v-three M ile s W e s t Eugene. E U G E N E AND LO R EN C E OE RO UTE. M o ney Saved WANTED.—Capable, reliable peroon In every roiin tv to reprewfnt large com pany of «olid financial, reputation; nalary per year, l»«ya- F ble 1’ w eekly; <3 per day afcKolutely sure and all penne.-*; straight, bona flf’e, definite »alary« no huuiMsioii; naJary paid etwli Saturday and ex- peiiHe money ad vti need each week. STANDARD HOUSE. 834 D earbokn 8 t ., C hicago . 41-14 i Do You W a n t a H om e In W e s te rn O regon D O N 'T a n il b e a u tifu l forests in th e S iu s la w v a lle y . s • Do You W ant a Ranch? Do You W ant Unimproved Land? Kodol Do You W ant Town Lots? Do You W ant Timber Lands? Dyspepsia Cure Digests w hat you eat. Prop * HOTEL, w ith i o f th e season, a ll U lv o 1 1 artificia lly digests the food aud aide WE BUY ANO SELL ALL KINDS OF REAL ESTATE QN COMMISSION. »T * BOB - t P ro p rieto rs. lo r e n p e O re g o n . fu rn is h e d TOBACCO SPtT and S M O K E Your U fe a w a y l You can be cured o f any form of tobacco uaing easily, lx? mada w ell, atrong, magnetic, fu ll of new life and vigor by tak ing H U - T O -D A O , that make» wreak men strong Many ^ain ten pound* in ten day». Over 5 0 0 , 0 0 0 cured. A ll druggist». Cure guaranteed. Book let and advice FRRK. Addr«»3 S T iyU JN O REM EDY CO., C hicago or New York. 437 C o m e to F lo re n c e a n il see th e fine farm s £ f » a t roniztng It. ile Ih o us ;; ►BOWSER IN A PANIC. T R A V E L E R S ' G U ID E T R A V E L E R S ’ G U ID E . A tto rn e y 'G e n e ra l D. R . N . B la c k b u rn i ................... R . S . Bean en ota luorenoe C ourt \ .................F- A. Moore with p«u,. r ' - ( . . . .G. E . W olverton J, conallpau ip la ln e d ut 1 <Jge 8e<x>nd D istr ict. .J . W . H am ilton 'ohiidreu^ofprosecuting A t t o r n e y .. .G eo. M. Brown and w h .j viSX-_____ —----------- fnoed boy. Tl tlpana Tabnl t a n y o n e (! ' FLORENCE, OREGON, FRIDAY. JU N E 7, 1901. VOL. erniari:»-« *•*' X I I. D erer rl Uv-^ lu lu a cro u d l ih o n i gettW ’i e u u d nick «¡HI G E N E R A L D IR E C T O R Y 1 heard ¿SB ab'Jlcs i - »tí J in lu e w h o i J tern fo r cafc ■mach. ShoXj 8 T A T E O F F IC E R S - ich rullef i sh e advise« h em too, at n d o in g so . . . T. T. G eer. v e rn o r ....................... aber, aud ,F . I. Dunbar. h a v e comp] 8eci retary of S 'a t e ----- m y hcudbcl ^JMMnxwrX............................ F - 8 . Moore. nnty u ln e yi n are wal. Sfupt. P u b lic 1 natruction J . H . Ackerm an its testin i' .“‘u ^ S a t o P rin te r ......................... W . H . Leede did not n. Ho waa a saffron col OOUNTY ala In favor »ns Tubi*,«« a-..... — my yi>upgitSH| y A D V E R T IS E R S SHJSLAW’S ONLY PAPES. ( O P P O R T U N IT Y J 4 YOUR H O H E PA P E R y*W’ > JOHN C. BECK. W. H. WEATHERSON. 1 N atu re la strengthsulug and recon structing th e exhausted dlgsstive or gans. I t lath e latest discovered digest- an t and tonic. N o o ther preparation can approach I t In efficiency. It in- stantly relieveeand perm anently cures Dyspepsia, Indigestion, fle a rtb u rn . Flatulence, 8our btomach, Nausea. Sick Headache, G astralgla Cramps and a ll other results of Im perfect digestion. Prsaersd W t- fc DvWlTT a CO. Cat*««» MBVKB A KYLB. W IT H A W IL D W HO O P O F E X U L T A T IO N . hop out of bed and trot down here! Here the blamed thing Is, and I f It doesn’t say cough sirup on the label then I ’m a”— But it dldu’L As he held the bottlo op to the light a picture of a skull aud cfossboues gr-rted hla eyes, and across the label ran the word “Laudanum.” Mrs. Bowser heard a whoop and a rush, and next minute Mr. Bowsic dashed Into the room w ith the cat at his heels. "W hat on earth Is It?" she asked ■■ he began to gather np and pull on hla socks and shoes. “ I —I ’ve taken poison—laudanum!" he gasped as bis teeth chattered and bis eyes bulged ouL “Then go a t ones to tbs drug store for a remedy. H ow careless e f youl Here Is your vesL Here’s year coat. I f you bavs taken laudanum, you must throw It off a t once and then drink a lot of strong coffee.” "Do you—you think I'm a dead man?” he stammered aa he get Into hla coat "Don’t stop to ask • slugl« question, bat fly for your life, end IT I go down and get the coffee ready.” It wae half past Id «Tclocfc. M r. Bowser hadn't waited to tie hie eboee, put on a collar or button hla eoat and vesL Aa he went np the street a t a gallop sereral people «eked him where the flr« was. aad a policeman Jemped out from behind • trse and tried to head h!m off. The drag store bed Jaet cloeed, but be net the ben to rto g t'g ■ 1 "W hat Is a sk eleton? Can you tail me, children?” asked a teacher o f het Sunday school clss9. T he In fant class^ looked troubled. T heir Ideas on the su b ject w ere e f the m ost vague description and, they seem ed to think, hnrdly worth m entioning. T he qu estion passed dow n the cla ss a l m ost to th e very foot, m eeting only a blank look or a sh ak e o f the bead, until a t la st th e sm a llest tot o f a ll ventured a reply ; “P leath , m ith, It ith a m an wRhant any m eat on It.” —London A nsw ers. -------------- -— — •< n . r R la h t e e a e l a d l a " a t l e ■ . On B a tte r A a tk o r ltr . She—Sister Mary called today, and ■he sa y s she teleph oned to K ashem 'a drug store yesterd ay and ask ed them to d eliver a m easnge to me, but they wouldn't. I’ll never deal there again. H e —B u t, m y dear, th at's three blocks aw ay. B esides, I didn’t know you d ealt there. She—But I do. I’ve bought p ostage ■tamps there qu ite frequently.—P h ila delph ia P ress. "Yon are looking handsom e tonlgfeL M iss FUte,” B agster rem arked la the pau ses o f the dance. “So Mr. S m yth e told m s a fe w min u tes ago.” Bagster (only remembering that Sm yth e is his hsted rival)— Wsll you w ou ld n’t b elieve anyth in g th at chum p said, w ould you?—P hiladelphia Tin A a B a e a o a a le a l C r e s s a tla n . “ Excuse me, sir,” said the man In the te x t seat, "but your cigar Is burning n hole In your paper.” “T h a t la all right,” reepowjed the other. " I am Just burning out the price of those sealskin mantles at to I morrow’s bargain sale. You take thia paper home."—Nuggets. la O ld K e a l a e k g . The parson cams out and remonstrat ed with the major for being too hasty with his gun. “ After he said t h a t ” M id the parson, “you should have forgiven him.” “And didn’t I f spoke ep the major. “Why. person. 1 wee eoe of his paD- C on (H ot le a O r le r a . “T h e average photographer." H enpeck m usingly, “is an unren hie creature.” “W hat’s the matter now?" asked Me friend. "Oh. w h ile m y w if e w a s sittin g fee her picture today the tool photographer su n g out: ’Look pleasanb please. Be natural P ' -P h ila d e lp h ia P ress. m a r k T e e th . The custom of women I n _ .nnrrlsge g ivin g their tseth an eresv last< ig coating o f biackit now by only • small there are stlil seen in the dreds of women hideous Ivory and dentists’ Shea sets of black teeth. bearsrs.”—Chicago Nswe. A man who gets Into never making ■«••liv Wenrta*. too sear perf< "Ruggles. I nevar sew you looking so Chicago News. woebegone before. Are you In lo v e f "Tee, but I ’ ve got the grip. too. and I Oqod advice la like i den’t know which of the two hurts me live, but i Wm